Blogging..break from YouTube :)

I'm "sort of" taking a break from YouTube. I say sort of because, well, I can't really stop YouTube I'm addicted. But I'm mostly laying off of working on my channel and making videos. For now.

I am going to be blogging more. I want to focus more on my blog right now and all that. YouTube and blogging kind of go hand in hand for me.

They are like a great tag-team duo. They compliment each other. My blog is a little more therapeutic maybe..because of the simple fact that it's easier for me to express thoughts in writing.

Sometimes it's hard for me to "fully" open up on video. It's more personal already you know. People watching you and whatnot.

On another note...I have been trying to deal with my mother's death for the last few months. It's been VERY hard.

Some days I hardly do anything. It's really hard for me to talk about her passing. I don't know how to process it or fully deal with it. It's so hard to face.

It doesn't even seem real...like a dream actually. Maybe someday I'll be able to face it..but for now, I'm honestly still in shock, even after a few months.

I'm officially an orphan now. And yes, losing both parents at ANY age means you're an orphan. I don't know how to deal with having both parents gone.

It's so hard. I can't even describe it. I don't know if I'll ever be "fully ok" again. I guess we will see. I am just managing day by day.

I just don't know if I'll ever feel whole and complete again. Death is so hard to deal with. Well anyways enough of that for now, thank you for reading and have an awesome day :)

Getting my stress under control :)

As I mentioned in a previous post, I've been SUPER Stressed out for quite a while. Today I feel a lot better.

I feel like I'm finally getting my stress dealt with. Stress is bad. When you finally get those relaxing moments it's like nothing else.

I'm really thankful. You just have to find things you really enjoy doing, that helps with stress a lot. On another note, the weekend is coming and I'm super excited about it.

I love weekends. It's my favorite time. Everything is so happy and good on the weekend. I woke up this morning in a really good mood. Had some coffee and hopped on the computer.

Uploaded a quick little YouTube video. I hope today is an awesome day. If you're reading this, hope you have an awesome day too :)

Getting over a cold or some kind of bug (blog post)

I've been fighting a really bad cold or flu or something. I've had a terrible sore throat to go along with it. It's been very uncomfortable.

I still have it, although it's not quite as bad as it was. Hopefully, it is leaving. It's been very cold and rainy out. That isn't helping matters.

Although I do love the rain, :) I've been feeling very blessed lately. This new year has started off awesome.

Counting blessings

God has really blessed me. I am so grateful. Last year was hard in some ways, like losing my mother. I'm thankful that this year is a lot better.

It's going to be a great year. I get depressed randomly, but I try to find ways to pull myself out of it. I love when God surprised you with good things. :)

There are good things all around, you just have to look for them. On another note, I really miss some of my friends.

Things change

I have kind of lost contact with a few friends that I really cared about. I miss them and all the fun we had together.

There's nothing like those friends who really "get you" and just understand you on a deep level that no one else does.

We all need friends like that.

Yesterday, it was really warm...like 64 degrees! :) It was awesome, felt just like spring. I regret not going for a long walk. I should have while it was warm.

No one's perfect

Having regrets sucks, but everything happens for a reason. You just have to keep moving forward and stay positive! :)

I've been feeling super stressed from working on YouTube so much and some other things. I'm trying to find healthy ways to deal with my stress.

Blogging helps, it's like a release for me. Looking forward to a year of great Karma and good vibes. I wish the same for you if you're reading this. :) Thank you for reading!

Please share.

Stress is bad (blog post)

Do you ever feel really stressed? I've been feeling that way lately. I'm not sure why. I think part of it is my Mom dying last year.

I don't think I've properly dealt with it yet. I don't really know how. It still doesn't seem real to me. I also get really stressed from a bunch of little annoyances that add up.

Can you relate?

We shouldn't let little things bother us. But sometimes they just keep adding up and that's where I get really stressed out. I need to learn to relax more.

I take anxiety medication as needed for my extreme anxiety.

It helps a lot. I think I just need to learn to express my feelings more.

That's always been hard for me. I bottle things up really bad. I think we all do that to some extent. I just have a lot on my heart and mind that is waiting to come out.

I've just been through a lot.

Still trying to figure out how to process it all. I need to remember to be grateful for all the little things, and also to not let the little annoyances bring me down.

After all, they are part of life. Therapy would probably help me a lot, but I've never been totally comfortable opening up to a stranger.

I think I'd just rather deal with things on my own. Blogging is like therapy for me. It really works. Just getting everything out.

Anyways thank you for reading, more to come later.

New year awesomeness! (New Year's day blog post)

It's a new year, and I'm really feeling the positivity. I feel like it's gonna be a really great year. It will be even better than last year.

I've made a few resolutions, which I hope to keep. Even if I don't keep them, it's about the journey and who you become in the process.

I've mostly been up to the same stuff, making YouTube videos and whatnot. Life is good, I can't complain.

The weather is also unusually warm right now for this time of year. That's why I love Missouri..it can get warm in the middle of winter! It's awesome.

Spring really isn't that far away. It usually gets warm pretty early here..usually around the end of February.

Also I've been doing live streams on YouTube..they are pretty long, one of them was 30 minutes long. It's pretty cool making really long videos.

Anyways, one of my resolutions is going to be to hopefully blog more on this blog. So stick around!

Thanks so much for reading guys,

Talk soon.